I wish they had taught me…
I wonder how many other 30 sums have had the thought that what we are taught as a child while of benefit did not prepare us for how to, at a fundamental level interact with people. I mean really interact with them, not just the surface level interaction of the day-to-day, but the moments that make you furious or break down in tears. We get fun little sayings - “Sticks and stones”… but where was the moment where any adult told me that I would be the only person who could truly hold me accountable. That you can be love or be loved entirely and that you or they will at a moment’s notice be capable of destroying the heart of the other, and that there can be no malice in the act all at the same time. Knowing what we know later in life and what skills in communication and empathy we likely develop as we age - Why is it that we do not spend more time helping the youth of this world to know and discover that they can be ok with themselves and let others simply be.
You will never be able to control the actions or thoughts of another person. Only your own actions and thoughts
You have to make the choice to be or do good in the world
Doing even small and unintentional acts can hurt others - And that these acts over time will and should way on you
Reflection and iteration of our own behavior are how we shed this burden.
Being perfect the first or 100th time is not as important as ensuring we take accountability, learn from our mistakes and try to do better next time
We send young people out into the world to impact and be impacted by those around them woefully unprepared for what they will face. Toss them into the deep end and see if they swim. Why not give them some floaties to keep their heads above water
Buddhists would say that life is a river and that we exist in the flow of it. We should strive to let the current wash over us and strive not to cling to the banks. Simply to say go with the flow and don’t hold onto things
Viewed through my interpretation of Stoicism I very much agree with this analogy, however, would add that instead of simply floating in the water we use the rational mind and teachings of the great thinkers to only stay afloat but to fashion a boat around us to subtly direct our travel down the path of the river. Still taking the turns and bends as they come, although with the power to shift our course when required. The current may be out of our control, but with preparation few difficulties we face need to be our end
“As long as you live, keep learning how to live.”
